We Thank the Lord Jesus Christ that His Mercy Knows No Limits!

This use to be a blogspot of a man that was very angry at God. I was angry at God for many years. I just would not admit it. I recently came to the place I rejected the exisetence of God. At least I thought I did. I would curse God and go out of my way to curse God's people. I hit lower than rock bottom and denied that God existed. In ignorance I blasphemened the Holy Spirit.
Over the last month I would hear gospel songs being sang in an audible voice. I would search through the house and nowhere was their any music playing. I tried to ignore these voices singing of God's faithfulness. I even told myself I was receiving bleed over signals in my house from strong raidio towers or through eletronic gagets in the house were picking them up. More and more this happened.
Last Monday night I heard a choral sing, "Great is thy Faitfulness." I walked across the house and I asked my wife, "Honey are you singing any gospel hymns?" She said no. "It has to be a feedback signal bleeding through some gadget. " I would tell myself.
On Tuesday morning I woke up hearing the old hymnal, "I Know Whom I Have Believed". And a soft gentle voice saying, "I will never let you go. I am faithful. Even if you are unfaithful I remain faithful to keep those which the Father has given to me."
Tuesday morning with my ears I heard more songs, "Great is Thy Faithfulness" and "Come unto me."
I went to my wife, we prayed together. I repented before the Lord and turned to Jesus asking him through so much sorrow and humility to forgive me and restore me , and I heard in my ears, "Dane I love you. Your sins are all gone, buried forever in the sea of my forgetfullness and you are my son."
And fuck you fundie! I am just bullshitting you! Non of the above is true!

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

God's Irresistible Grace

By Dane Eidson
Published Wednesday, June 10th, 2009
Satan is envious of the Church's score card because each point represents the bruisings, crushings, back stabbings and all the pains that have deeply wounded so many hearts that happened on their way to the Kingdom.
Christians are often the only creatures that eats their own young, their most hurt, and the weakest. They often tear into any fellow believer for the smallest of infractions whether it be for dogma or words of disagreement even between family members.
I was both giver and receiver of this vicious cycle. But this is not what this posts is about....this time.....at least.
The Irresistible Grace of God.
No matter how much I blasphemed God and cursed Him and His people God refused to leave me alone. It did get to a place where I would go for a long time without sensing God's presence and this made it easier for me ignore and deny His presence. And when God would come back and pull on my heart I only grew more angry and much more bitter and more determined than ever to prove God did not exist.
When Christians with in my own close family and who were once best of friends returned my evil with greater evil and revenge that only justified in my eyes I was right and they were wrong. But little did I know the ends did not justify the means.
My wife after listening to all my flowery debates against the existence of God would always ask me the same question, "Why do I as a Christian still love you and desire to be with you and forgive you no matter what?" I would become frustrated because no matter how much I tried to explain her whys and what-fors I could not offer one single piece of a logical argument to refute her.
Early last week I began to hear with my ears old Gospel songs. "Great is Thy Faithfulness, I know in Whom I have Believed, Amazing Grace and other wonderful songs. I would go into the other room and ask my wife what she was singing. She said each time she was not singing. I would be woke up on two different nights with the same songs being heard by my ears. No radio on, no TV station tuned to a religious station and I asked my wife again if she was singing.
It was 3 AM Tuesday. She said no she was not singing. After the third incident same as before this time I said aloud, "Who is this singing?" Immediately I felt shame, sadness, joy, gladness, and a desire to call out to Jesus Christ. I went into the living room where my wife was at. I asked her to pray with me after sharing with her what had been happening.
I ask my wife how and what to pray. She told me to just pray. I said I can't because I am very angry with God and His people. Delores told me to start my prayer by telling God what I just told her. I cried out to God and asked Him to forgive me for causing so much pain and harm onto others through my vile words and rebellious actions. I asked God to forgive me. I asked Jesus to save me. I told him even if it did not make complete sense to me I am by faith trusting in Jesus alone for my salvation. That I believe in my heart he died for me on the Cross and was resurrected bodily from the dead. I did not get a single rebuke or one condemning word about my past. All I got in return was all I needed. The love and forgiving compassion of the gentle Saviour.
When I ended my prayer I realized that Jesus never left me in the first place. He was always there. That his love is so perfect he took all my hatred, bitterness, anger and rebellion against him and His children and He erased these sins all away and replaced them with a redeemed heart.
I love thee Lord Jesus. I Am Free.


cindy said...

Dane i am so releaved and proud that this has happened to you ..we all prayed that it would . know that i love you very much your sis cindy...

cindy said...

Dane im very reeleaved and proud that this has happened we all pryed that it would...know that i love you very much your sis cindy....

Grace said...

Hi, Dane, it's me, Grace. What wonderful news.

It's true God's love in Christ for us is unconditional whether we realize it or not. He believes in us, even when we can't sense His presence, and is faithful through everything.

Dane, I'm so sorry for your pain, and that you've been treated in this hurtful way by other Christian believers especially. May God forgive them.

But, I've been holding you, and your family in prayer ever since that day when we first talked.

I wanted to share with you too, that it's my firm conviction that faith does not mean the absence of doubt. God honors all of our sincere questions, and honest searching for truth. It's really okay. We can relax into our unity with Him in Christ.

This Scripture totally speaks to me:

Romans 8:31-39 (New International Version)

31What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? 33Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. 34Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. 35Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? 36As it is written:
"For your sake we face death all day long;
we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered."[a] 37No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[b] neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Dane, God bless you, and Delores. Hope to read more from both of you on your new blog.

Dane Eidson said...

I am sorry the way I talked to you. I really do appreciate your forgiveness towards me for insulting you. If it were not for the Spirit of God working through the prayers of his Saints I would not have been set free. I am so grateful Jesus never left me. His forgiveness is greater than the worst sin.
God bless you Grace.

Grace said...

Thank you, Dane. But, don't give it another thought. I understood that you were really hurting.

God bless!